Marriage Communication Assessment
Step 1: Assess where you are at:
- Why do you feel communication needs to be improved?
- What are the best conversations you and your spouse have? Why?
- Where are you struggling to communicate?
Step 2: On a scale of 1-10 how good would you say your communication is?
- 1-2 scale- you want to know how to deepen intimacy and understanding even better
- 3-4 scale- you communicate well but have a few issues you’re having difficulty resolving
- 5-6 scale- you communicate on a surface level but don’t address real issues or have tension when they are brought up. You have no structure or support for addressing issues or getting needs met.
- 7-8 scale- you argue you a lot and seem to disagree or fall into bad communication habits more often than not. There seems to be little you have in common or can communicate about
- 9-10 scale- you cannot have a conversation about even the simplest things without it escalating into a fight or disagreement.
Step 3: Reflect
- What do you need to move up a level or two or even get to a level 10?
- Do you need to set boundaries? Clarify what good communication means
- to you? Get outside help from a coach or professional who has helped other struggling couples master communication?
- How do you communicate problems that need to be resolved to your spouse, your friends/family and yourself?
- How do you talk to yourself? Would you talk that way to a friend?
Are you taking time to step back and get to the core issue or need, or do you let the problem and uncomfortable emotion swirl around inside your head?
Take action! Go back to what you determined you need to do to move up a level and eventually get to a level 10 and take one small step each day this week. You will be amazed if given even a little time and focus, how quickly your communication can improve!